Humor: Beethoven

[jondd@juno.com (Jon D Dayley)]

>A number of years ago, the Seattle Symphony was doing Beethoven's 
>Ninth under the baton of Milton Katims.  At this point, you must
understand 
>two things:  
>
>(1) There's a long segment in this symphony where the bass
>violins don't have a thing to do. Not a single note for page after 
>page;
>
>(2)  There used to be a tavern called Dez's 400 right across the 
>street from Seattle Opera House, rather favored by local musicians. 
>
>
>It had been decided that during this performance, after the bass 
>players had played their parts in the opening of the Ninth, they were to
quietly 
>lay down their instruments and leave the stage rather than sit on their 
>stools looking and feeling dumb for twenty minutes.  Well, once they got
>backstage, someone suggested that they trot across the street and 
>quaff a few brews. After they had downed the first couple of rounds, one
said,
>"Shouldn't we be getting back? It'd be awfully embarrassing if we were
>late."
>
>
>Another, presumably the one who suggested this excursion in the first
>place, replied, "Oh, I anticipated we could use a little more time, so 
>I tied a string around the last pages of the conductor's score. When he
gets 
>down to them, Milton's going to have to slow the tempo way down while he
waves
>the baton with one hand and fumbles with the string with the other."
>
>
>So they had another round and finally returned to the Opera House, a 
>little tipsy by now. However, as they came back on stage, one look at
their
>conductor's face told them there were in serious trouble.
>
>
>Katims was furious! And why not? After all...it was the bottom of the
>Ninth, the score was tied, and the basses were loaded.