Humor: Performance Appraisals

[jondd@juno.com (Jon D Dayley)]

These are quite funny!



>Performance Appraisals:
>
>1.  Not the sharpest knife in the drawer
>
>2.  A room temperature IQ
>
>3.  Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
>
>4.  Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all 
>together
>
>5.  A gross ignoramus--- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus
>
>6.  A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.
>
>7.  A prime candidate for natural deselection.
>
>8.  Bright as Alaska in December,
>
>9.  One-celled organisms out score him on IQ tests
>
>10. Donated his body  to science before he was done using it.
>
>11. Fell out of the family tree.
>
>12. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but there's no train in 
>sight
>
>13. Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
>
>14. He's so dense light bends around him.
>
>15. If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
>
>16. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
>
>17. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.
>
>18. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
>
>19. It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
>
>20. One neuron short of a synapse
>
>21. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.
>
>22. Takes him 1 1/2 hours to watch 60 minutes.
>
>23.  Was left on the Tilt a Whirl a bit too long as a baby
>
>24.  Wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.